#34 Mia Silverman on Choosing a Vibrant Life with Allergies

In this episode, Dr. Whitehouse is joined by an inspiring young adult living with multiple food allergies, Mia Silverman. Mia shares her journey of navigating the world with confidence, resilience, and clarity. Together, they discuss what it really looks like to say “yes” to life, while still taking precautions and honoring the realities of her medical needs.

From dealing with bullying to building meaningful friendships and dating with food allergies, to tackling food challenges and managing the emotional ups and downs along the way, this episode is packed with practical insights and deep validation for anyone growing up allergic or raising someone who is.

Mia shares her favorite tools, perspectives, and voices in the allergy advocacy space, leaving listeners with both encouragement and resources they can turn to.

Allergies With Mia
@allergieswithmia

Food Allergy and Anaphylaxis Connection Team | FAACT
Asthma and Allergy Foundation of America | AAFA | Home
FARE Teen Advisory Group - FoodAllergy.org 

CA Restaurant menu labeling bill (SB 68) addie tells all | food allergy

Dr. Zachary Rubin @rubin_allergy
Dr. Ruchi Gupta @drruchigupta_
Dr. Payel Gupta @nycdoctor (Co-host @theitchpodcast)

Miss Allergic Reactor - The No.1 Resource for Travelers with Food Allergies to Safely Navigate The World (@miss_allergic_reactor)
Food Allergy Cards | Translation Cards in 52 Languages – Equal Eats
Top 9 Allergen-Free Meat Sticks & Snacks | Lorissa's Kitchen
Abe's Muffins
Welcome to MadeGood - United States – MadeGoodFoods-USA

SPOKIN food allergy app

Special thanks to Kyle Dine for permission to use his song The Doghouse for the podcast theme!
www.kyledine.com

Find Dr. Whitehouse:
-thefoodallergypsychologist.com
-Instagram: @thefoodallergypsychologist
-Facebook: Dr. Amanda Whitehouse, Food Allergy Anxiety Psychologist
-welcome@dramandawhitehouse.com

Transcript

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Speaker 0:01

Welcome to the Don't Feed the Fear podcast, where we dive into the complex world of food allergy anxiety. I'm your host, Dr. Amanda Whitehouse, food allergy anxiety psychologist and food allergy mom. Whether you're dealing with allergies yourself or supporting someone who is, join us for an empathetic and informative journey toward food allergy calm and confidence..

0:22

Welcome back to the summer season of Don't Feed the Fear, where we are talking about making positive, helpful choices to help us live vibrant, full lives. And our guest today is an incredible young adult and advocate content creator Mia Silverman is here to share how she does it from taking on food challenges, trying new treatments to navigating friendships, dating, bullying. And pursuing her goals for her own future. She brings honesty, resilience, and a whole lot of inspiration and life experience to this conversation. She'll also share with you her go-to resources, the mindset and helpful thoughts that keep her grounded and the choices she's made that have helped her move forward without letting fear take over. Whether you're already familiar with Mia or if she is new to you, I know you're gonna love listening to her.

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 1:10

Mia, I am so happy to meet you. Thank you for being here on don't feed the fear.

Mia Silverman 1:14

Yes, likewise. I'm super excited to chat with you today, Amanda. It's such an honor to be here

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 1:18

Oh, well, I know everybody is enjoying listening to all you're sharing about your life and your experiences, and probably many people are already familiar with you. But why don't you give us a little bit of background about how you found yourself to be this allergy celebrity, superstar person.

Mia Silverman 1:34

Well, started posting content around COVID during like March of 2020, so kind of in the beginning of the whole lockdown era I would say. I posted a video listing all my allergies. I have over 50 allergies and I listed like my top 10 and it was like to like a quirky, silly song. I posted it online, did not think anything of it, then overnight got around I think almost a million views or or a million views. I forget how much and. I show my parents, they're like, mom, dad, like this video that my allergies went viral, and they're like, Mia, this could be a chance for you to like find your people online, educate people, share your story. You should keep posting and see what happens. Like, you know what? Why not? I'm in lockdown. I have nothing to lose. So I did that. I kept posting like all the time, but my allergies, showing how I travel, what I eat in a day, dating anything that involves like how I live my life. But with allergies, I would showcase that on my page and it brought me to where I am today where. I have, you know, a, a really big following on TikTok and Instagram and YouTube, and I've been able to work with amazing brands, work with different nonprofits, speak at conferences, and even being on your podcast today,

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 2:43

I imagine that part of the way that that video blew up was when people hear someone say, I have Over 50 allergens. That's, that's to some people, just shocking. Did that happen from when you were young? Did they develop over time? How did you discover that you have so many allergens?

Mia Silverman 2:58

Yeah, so when I was around one-ish or two-ish years old, um, my mom or my dad came home from work one day and brought these cookies from his office. I don't know if it had either pistachios or cashews. I always forget which nut it did, but it had one of those nuts. And my, I was already kind of a colicky baby. Whenever I would consume milk, I would start crying and having stomachaches. My parents kind of knew I had some sort of intolerance to something, but not actual, like severe food allergies and, and so I ate one of these cookies and. My throat closed up. I was covered in rashes and hives. I could not breathe. I was vomiting, so I was experiencing anaphylaxis for the first time and that was really scary for my parents. And so they called 9 1 1, got into an ambulance, they gave me epinephrine and they ran lots of tests on me and all these allergies. Came back really like positive, like skin tests. And they said, you have this long list of allergies. Here's this list for my parents. Go figure it out. And so they referred me to an allergist and I did, you know, tons of allergy testing throughout the years. And I just gained more as I grew up. So I was diagnosed with like a very long list and I've only outgrown six or seven allergies in my lifetime. And I'm 22 years old. That's not a lot, but it's something

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 4:09

Right. Well, and and you've just been posting about that. I was so excited that you said you did just recently outgrow your almond allergy. Right.

Mia Silverman 4:15

I did. That was one of my most severe like deadly allergies that I did my very best to avoid at all costs. Because it was super, super high with my skin and blood tests. And last year I did a skin test and it came back negative. I was like, oh my gosh. So I did one more skin test and blood test to confirm it and it was negative. So I did a food challenge and I. And so it was super exciting and I mean, I've been trying to eat almond butter every single day now just to get my body used to the taste and the texture, but it's still very anxiety inducing, like eating that. 'cause I've considered it like one of my most of your allergies my entire life.

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 4:47

Well, you're no stranger to dealing with that anxiety in some form or another. That's one of the really big things I wanna talk about first. Food challenges are one of the most terrifying experiences, and and they be so helpful though medically. Right? This was not your first food challenge, it sounds like.

Mia Silverman 5:02

I've probably don't like ten in my life and I actually have one more coming up in like less than two weeks for salmon. So I, I do them when I can because even though they're super scary 'cause you're eating your allergen, I try to view it as like an opportunity to potentially have a new safe food to eat and I'll do anything to do that. If that means eating my allergen at my doctor's office for like three hours. So be it like so be it.

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 5:25

Well, especially if you were to gain back almond and salmon, those are two of like the healthiest foods in the world. So

Mia Silverman 5:30

Oh yeah.

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 5:31

freedom and safety, and it might be something that's really good for your health in the long term.

Mia Silverman 5:36

Exactly. I'm always wanting to expand my diet 'cause my diet is quite limited. So when I have an opportunity to do a food challenge, I was like, I'm like, okay, when can I book it asap? Like I need to do it now. So I'm very excited about this Salmon food Challenge. So I did actually do the salmon food challenge when I was in middle school and did not pass. So I'm hoping this time around I do pass. So fingers crossed.

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 5:58

Well, and I appreciate you sharing it because that's huge for people to hear. You've been through this, you did not pass, right, and you're still willing to do it. Can you talk people through how do you psych yourself up? How do you prepare? How do you, what do you do on the day of to actually get through all that stress and worry?

Mia Silverman 6:13

Yeah, so for starters, medically, I can't take any antihistamines for about a week prior to the food challenge, which is difficult for me. I take Zyrtec every single day for once. I have terrible seasonal allergies and I sneeze a ton, but also two because it's like a protection layer for me. Whenever I eat food, I, it makes me feel a little bit less anxious. So removing that protection layer essentially kind of makes you feel already anxious enough. So usually when I go to a food challenge, I either have my mom or my dad go with me. So I have like someone that I feel safe with and can distract me and talk to me and make me feel safe. I also will bring, you know, activities like books or watch some shows to distract me as well. But during the days leading up to it, I try to do extra self-care and things that make me happy and make me feel safe. So I'll go to my favorite restaurant if I want to. I'll, you know. my favorite movies, read some books, go outside, exercise, hang out with friends. Um, call my boyfriend 'cause we're long distance right now. So doing things that make me feel happy and confident. So when I go into the food challenge, I feel as prepared as possible and I will still feel anxious and nervous during the food challenge. Like I cannot deny that. But I feel better knowing I have these different self-care like tools in my toolbox essentially. And I have like someone with me to keep me company in case something does go wrong. And also just to keep me like company and like a safe person to be there with me. That makes sense.

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 7:34

It makes so much sense. I mean, there's so many parts of that sitting here as a psychologist, I'm like, oh yes, you're checking off all these boxes. Number one. Some people really like if they have one allergen and they just can avoid it their whole lives, you know, they still might have a really high level of anxiety around it, but they can just avoid it all the time and you haven't had that luxury. So we know that r ealizing I can feel anxious, but I'm okay. I can tolerate this is just something that you haven't had the choice to avoid. You've had to learn that hard lesson.

Mia Silverman 8:02

Exactly. Exactly. 'cause as someone that has so many allergies, one of my biggest concerns is cross contact. And that's something that like I experience a lot, so I could have just one allergy and avoid it at all costs. That would be so much more luxurious and easy. But this is the, like the deck of cards. I was, you know, handed my hand. I've kept to work with what I got. And so again, While food challenges are super scary and just the concept of eating an allergen that could potentially put your life or your, like in danger, like I just do it because I'm one, like in a medical office, I'm with my doctor. I, I am in good hands, so in case something were to go wrong, I have epinephrine, I have Benadryl or Zyrtec, whatever they, you're gonna give me, like available right in front of me and I'm safe. So I try to remind myself those things, even while I'm eating it. But I still experience anxiety that that's still something very normal and you have to kind of just sit with it and deal with it and let it pass. 'cause it will

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 8:54

Right, and know that you can tolerate it.

Mia Silverman 8:56

exactly.

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 8:57

that, I know people are curious and we get into really black and white, the way we talk about food challenge, like pass or fail. It's not a fail. You learned information, right. But the actual experience of having failed a food challenge, I think terrifies people. Do you mind sharing so that they can get out of the like all or nothing, black or white? Thinking around what that might be like for them.

Mia Silverman 9:18

Yeah, so when you have a food challenge, you have to keep in mind that you have a chance of outgrowing it because the numbers are so low. So while maybe you didn't pass the first time, you might actually pass the second time. It just, it just does take time sometimes. When, when you quote unquote fail a food challenge, like you're not failing, it's just like maybe a detour and the progress you're trying to make with growing, outgrowing your allergies and to not feel discouraged because the fact that you were able to have a food challenge in the first place should be encouraging 'cause you were able to potentially outgrow it. So there is still a chance and to not like lose hope because again, you know, had a salmon food challenge when I was in middle school and I actually did pass during it. But then when I went home, I threw up and had a reaction, like a delayed reaction. So I technically failed, but. I went to the doctor's office to get my skin and blood testing for this year. And the numbers for salmon were way lower than they were when I was in middle school. So now I actually think I actually have a higher chance of outgrowing it. And it kind of just takes time and patience and to just know that it's not over, like there's still hope and you could potentially outgrow it. And to just like try to stay optimistic if you can and just know that like. Even if you only had like two doses of salmon, your body was able to tolerate two doses and that's amazing. That's amazing. Your body's even capable of doing that and to be proud of your body for being strong enough to do that. 'cause that's super, super amazing

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 10:37

You're a little bit safer because maybe if you can tolerate two bites of salmon now, you don't have to worry about the salmon cross contact so much at a restaurant, even though you're still gonna be careful about it, right? It might ease your mind a little bit.

Mia Silverman 10:48

Exactly. And it, and it's just also showing that you did the food challenge and you should be proud of yourself for even going in the first place and doing it. Because doing a food challenge again is really scary. But the fact that you're able to go and even if you didn't pass, you still did it, you should be proud of yourself for that. 'cause that is still a win within itself.

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 11:03

Absolutely. And I think another piece is that like you described, you pass at the office, but then you went home and you had some vomiting. It's not always an immediate, full-blown anaphylactic shock reaction that people are fearing. There's a lot of in-betweens.

Mia Silverman 11:18

It can just be like a thing of hives on your arm and that's it. It could be, you know, your throat feeling really itchy and that's it. And the minute you feel those symptoms, you stop, and that's it, and it won't get any worse. I remember I did a food challenge for peanut butter when I was in middle school as well, I had like a little pea size, thing of peanut butter, and I reacted to it. I got hives, my throat felt itchy and I stopped. But anaphylaxis did not happen. It was minor for what it was. it showed that I even this much didn't make me have a reaction that was anaphylactic. It was just, it was minor, but it wasn't like life threatening. So my body was still strong enough to tolerate some form of peanut butter, and that to me was like a win in some way. I think just being mindful of that, it's not gonna be like a. you're gonna be fine or you're gonna have anaphylactic reaction. It might be something in between. So don't fear for the worst. They give you a small dose for a reason, and you're gonna be doing that food challenge for a reason too. They're not gonna make you eat an allergen that is so severe. They're gonna run the skin and blood tests to confirm that before you do anything. They're not gonna make you have almond butter if your IgE levels are like through the roof, they're not gonna do that to you because that would be silly, you know?

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 12:21

Yeah. That part a lot of times comes down to the trust that you have in your doctor because they're the one interpreting the results, recommending whether it's time for a challenge and if you're reacting in the office, I think it can be a positive experience to have that happening with medical professionals. They're observing you, giving you feedback, maybe walking you through using, um, you know, an, an antihistamine or the epinephrine if it's necessary. Like all of that I think can be really trust building in them and in yourself.

Mia Silverman 12:48

Oh a absolutely. I mean, I've been seeing the same allergist for like, I don't know, six or seven years now. And you know, I would feel safe knowing if I had a reaction he would be there. And that makes you feel safe. And I think that just also trying to trust your doctors to some extent because that's what they do for a living. They study like their whole lives for this and they want you, they wanna help you and help you potentially outgrow allergies. So. Having those conversations with them and building trust is super important. So I totally agree with you on that, Amanda.

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 13:16

Yeah. It is a super brave thing to do. It takes a lot of courage. It's hard, and I don't mean to minimize that by like, let's look at this bright side and that bright side. 'cause it is hard and just kudos to you and everyone who has to do it. Folks with allergies, I always say are the bravest people I know. It's, it's a really tough thing to face.

Mia Silverman 13:33

I mean, not only like physically, but just like the mental, like obstacles you have to go through to like eat a food that was once considered like poison to your body, essentially. You avoided it at all costs and everything you can to avoid now you're eating it. It's a weird mental experience having to like try to like know you're gonna be fine, but it's still a kind of anxiety inducing, so I do agree. I think people have allergies are really brave and doing food challenges. Are still like a risk, you know, there's still like your risk, you, it's still like a risk technically, but it's like a calculated risk because you're, you've gone through the skin and blood testing, you talk to your doctor and they're confident that it could be potentially a good opportunity for you just to try. And you're gonna get, your body checked every 15 minutes, your doctors are right there waiting for you if you need them. So you're not doing it like alone in your house. You're doing it in a very highly supervised, safe environment. So it's like a calculated risk. Like it's still a risk, but it's like the safest one possible.

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 14:27

Right. Then it's done consciously and mindfully.

Mia Silverman 14:30

Yes.

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 14:30

Well, another big risk that I wanna talk about that you have done is put yourself out there for all of us to learn from and get familiar with. And, that is a big choice that you made. Like you said in the beginning. It happened quickly and then you decided to take it further. But I know one of the things I wanted to touch on was all of this. Negativity that you get and you choose to persevere anyway. Can you just talk about what that's like to continue to choose to advocate for yourself and for other people, even though there's probably a lot of challenges.

Mia Silverman 14:58

It's a great question. I mean, I get hate comments and hate dms on the daily. I get crazy comments from people saying, go like un alive yourself, like you're God's typo, natural selection, like the craziest comments ever. And at first I would let it get to me and I would take them personally, but I've kind of learned as someone that wants to study psychology, like I'm getting my master's in it in the fall. That people that comment hateful, things are hurting deep inside and they're projecting that onto you. And so I just feel bad for people that comment that I'm like, wow, it's so sad that you're gonna comment to being mean on somebody else. Like you don't even know them. They're a complete stranger. That is really sad. I feel sorry for you. I'm not gonna take it seriously. And people also are just bored and they're just gonna be like in, their mom's basement trolling and saying really mean things. And I just learned to not take it seriously. And to just have empathy for those that are commenting hateful things. 'cause they're probably hurting and they're probably sad and feel they need to hurt other people so they can feel better. So I try to shift my mindset about that, but I still will see comments and it kind of hurts to read them. But I try to focus on like the positive feedback that I get and the people that I'm helping, making a difference in their lives because that's what I'm doing this for, is to help other people so they can have the confidence to live their life fully with allergies and, and not hold themselves back from like traveling, going to university. You know, doing things that people that don't have allergies do, do, like normally, you know what I mean? So, it's hard. Like it definitely is hard, but I try not to let it get to me because it's not worth it

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 16:25

Obviously I follow you on social media and a lot of people obviously are, are reading everything you're putting out there.

Mia Silverman 16:31

Yes. Oh, and it's, it's crazy because I Google my name and everything comes up like you, like it's very easy to find me online now, which is like, kind of crazy. 'cause I, even when I was a kid, I actually used to post like music videos online as a kid. They're no longer on there. 'cause I was like, these are, these are embarrassing. But I've always had like an online presence of some kind. But this is like to the next level. So it's definitely crazy, like when people will notice me in public, like, oh, you're the girl with the ay, like, I follow, you know, like that is. Crazy. What do you mean you follow me? Like what? So, uh, it's definitely weird, having all these people have eyes on you, but I also feel like it's a privilege and an honor. People wanna watch my content and feel like they're gaining something from it, because that's what I'm hoping to do, is for people again, to feel like they're learning something from my page and that they feel like they're less alone if they have allergies. So,

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 17:16

Yeah, and especially someone one young like you, I mean, a lot of kids aren't obviously going to be dealing with that on the scale that you are and the high level of visibility that you are. But

Mia Silverman 17:23

I.

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 17:24

I think it's important for them, and maybe you can talk a little bit more about your perspective on kids just in everyday life dealing with that bullying and that unkindness and lack of understanding and things.

Mia Silverman 17:33

Oh yeah. I mean, I was bullied a lot when I was in middle school and high school. I remember in class. This one girl, wanted to read, I had this like allergy card that had like all my allergies on there, like not the top like 10 ones that I had, but like all of them. And she like, oh, I wanna read your allergy list. And she read it out loud and was like laughing at it in front of my class and making fun of it. I've had kids, threaten to sneak nuts into my food to see what happens. They think it's funny, like I've been bullied. I totally like understand that experience and. I'll just say that, middle school and high school is a difficult time for a lot of people because people are immature during that age. They're immature, they're selfish. They don't know how to put themselves in someone else's shoes and have empathy. But I do think that there are people that are also kind, and I think finding community outside of school is what helps, whether that's like joining like a. Food allergy advocacy group because I know FARE does actually have like food allergy, teen groups. So joining one of those is great. Or like finding like online Facebook groups and like meeting up with people or support groups of some kind. So I think that there are ways to like navigate the bullying and find nice people outside of school because that's what I did. Um. mean, when I was posting my videos online as a kid, like I made friends like on YouTube and I'm still like best friends with some of them today. Like we met in real life. Like my friend was just visiting me from like for the weekend. It was so much fun. So like there are ways to make friends and cope with it, ways that are like healthy. I think also just like talking to the school about it, if you're having concerns about bullying, like please. Advocate and talk to your teacher, talk to their principal, because their job is to also keep you safe. if they're a good teacher, they're not gonna tolerate that because bullying should never be tolerated. I think, like for me, once I went to college, I met my people. So it does get better. I think in general, whether you had allergies or not, middle school and high school is a hard time. It's like a weird, awkward time for a lot of people. So it's just that time that's like difficult. But once you're out of that. High school, middle school era, it's a lot better. But I think finding community outside of school really helps for sure.

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 19:31

Not just to escape the bullying, but like you said, to connect with other people in real life who understand and who can relate to what you're going through. I think that's true for everyone and whatever their individual challenges in life, it helps to know, not to isolate yourself to that group, but to know other people who, who get you, and to feel understood and seen.

Mia Silverman 19:48

It'll help you build more self-confidence and you won't let that bullying like get to you as much. And I think if you are experiencing bullying, one thing is just to ignore and to not give them power. 'cause the minute someone bullies you and you, and you entertain that or, or react in some way, it gives the bully power. I remember playing like this game in therapy called like Stop, or like no more bullies or something. It was like a board game. I had to learn how to deal with bullies because I was bullied a lot. So. It. It does get easier as you get older, but I encourage people to find community outside of school too and to talk to the school as well if there is bullying happening. 'cause it should never be tolerated.

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 20:22

Yeah, and you, and you mentioned, are you comfortable talking about, I think therapy can be an amazing resource for people,

Mia Silverman 20:27

Oh yeah. Of course. And I wanna become a psychologist just like you one day. That's my goal. And I mean, I've been in therapy since I was in the third grade. And now again, I'm 22 years old. I've been in therapy for a very long time, for various reasons. One, because I also have dyslexia and experienced bullying for that in school as well. I saw food allergy psych. For like four or five years. And she totally changed my life. You know, she really helped me learn how to cope with my allergies in a healthy way. If I'm, you know, if I'm having a reaction, learning how to stay calm, how to breathe, like doing deep breaths, listening to music, finding things to distract myself so I'm not focusing on solely just that. Um, but I think therapy is so important. I think everyone should see a therapist. I think that. It helps you understand yourself better, how to set boundaries so you can keep yourself safe. So like if someone offers you food, you can just politely decline it and not feel guilty about it. 'cause I used to feel super guilty, but like, I don't wanna eat your foods. I, it's gonna, make me sick. But I learned like it's okay to say no. Learning how to have boundaries and how to love yourself and embrace your allergies and. view them as something that's negative but also that, can kind of keep you safe and help you like filter out who are gonna be good friends in your life. 'cause also like quick side note, I always discuss this whenever I get the opportunity to. If you have friends that are mean to you about your allergies or not your real friends use your allergies to help you filter out who is worthy of, of your time, who's not worthy of your time. And I learned that in therapy, when I would be like my therapist. Therapist, like all my friends were being mean to me in school. Well, those are not your real friends. Your real friends will never, ever judge you. They'll embrace your allergies. They'll make you feel safe to do whatever they can to feel like you're included and welcomed and cherished and loved. So I think therapy is so important to help you cope with allergies because allergies do affect like your everyday life. Not just eating, but also school, your social life, traveling, just navigating life in general. So I think I always encourage. People to go to therapy if they can afford it, or, finding a support group if that's more accessible to them. 'cause obviously, therapy is expensive and it's not always accessible to everyone. But if you can do it, I highly encourage it.

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 22:26

It's a good point. A lot of times we get into these conversations about do this, try this. Everybody's, health insurance doesn't cover it at, in a way that's affordable. Not everybody can find a psychologist who specializes in food allergies, right? There's a lot of these things that are ideal, but not available. there are other sources of support too, like you said, not.

Mia Silverman 22:42

Absolutely. There are so many online support groups and Facebook groups you can find, and just talking to other people that are like-minded could already bring you some sort of reassurance and validation and feeling like less alone. So there's other alternatives out there. I totally agree.

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 22:56

Well, and I, I have to point out, I think you're such a good example of how effective it is because back to when you were talking about how do you, prepare for a food challenge. I'm sure you talked with that with your therapist, you're clearly so informed of how to regulate your body and, and have Trusted people safe and get exercise and move your body to release stress. All the things that you were talking about are so well-informed and evidence-based in terms of here is what helps your body release stress and make room for tolerating something that's challenging.

Mia Silverman 23:23

Exactly. Thank you. I mean, self care is so important with anything in life, but especially if you have like a chronic illness or like food allergies, it's really key to learn how to regulate your emotions and try to stay calm and grounded. Obviously then you're gonna still experience anxiety, but there's ways to kind of cope with it so it's easier to tolerate and you feel more okay and safe.

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 23:43

Part of one of my soapbox is self-care is not just, oh, I went to this spa and got my nails done and I had a sauna and I had a, it's, it's the difficult but necessary and responsible things you're doing to take care of yourself, to manage your allergies. Self-care is communicating to the people around you, even if it's uncomfortable, what your needs are. It's carrying your medicine. It's all of those not luxurious and fun things too, right? It's all the things that make you safe and healthy.

Mia Silverman 24:10

Totally, I completely agree. It's self-care is key. I always advocate for that.

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 24:16

Yeah.

Mia Silverman 24:16

will help you mentally and also physically too,

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 24:19

Yeah. We talked a little bit about privilege and one of the things that you had posted on somewhat recently that I think is another important thing to acknowledge as we're having these conversations about making choices and what's a choice and what's, what's not. You had posted about your medical bills after you had a reaction. Well, this allergy life is, it's something right.

Mia Silverman 24:39

it. I mean, I'm privileged to have really excellent health insurance 'cause of my dad's work, but that's not the reality for most Americans, you know? And especially with the current administration trying to cut, you know, Medicaid, Medicare, that's also a concern of mine for people with allergies and other chronic health conditions. But yeah, I mean, it makes me disappointed when I got my medical bill and seeing that it was like. $5,000 to be in a hospital bed in a hallway, not even in a room, just in a hallway. And I'm like, this is actually ridiculous. Well, mind you, my brother and I were in Amsterdam and he had a reaction. He had to go to the emergency room and thankfully he was not admitted. They evaluated him, they gave him some prescriptions, but it was free. We paid nothing.

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 25:21

Even though he was not a resident, even though he is not a citizen. Wow.

Mia Silverman 25:25

they say, okay, you're gonna go bye. I'm like, I'm like, what? What about like, do I have to pay? Like, nope, that's it. I'm like, what? was so, it was so like, it was a, a shock. So, you know, having allergies is not our choice and it's, it's sucks that we have to pay so much to get like epinephrine. Autoinjectors can cost up to $600 for a pack of two. Getting, I take Zyrtec and Zyrtec is not, is not cheap either. Having to get like those pills, it's like 30, $40 a container, which it adds up over time. It's really a shame that our healthcare system is not accessible for people with all kinds of health issues. Not just allergies, but you know, even cancer, diabetes, heart problems. So, but when you have allergies, you really see that happen when you have, you get your ambulance bills 'cause insurance doesn't really ever cover ambulance bills. They never do. Even if you have excellent insurance like mine, they still don't cover it completely. I still have to pay, like, I don't even know, 1500 for that.

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 26:17

Yeah.

Mia Silverman 26:17

So it's just really. Disappointing I made and I like, I had to pose about it to one, show some transparency to show this is like what the American healthcare system is like, but also to show just like the reality of people with allergies, they have to have to pay a lot of money to just be safe and stay alive. So

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 26:33

Yeah, and you can only learn it as you go. Like the last one that we had, um, the last time we had to call an ambulance, we got the bill and it was way more than the last time I had had to call an ambulance. They were out of network. And I was like, well, I don't get to choose which ambulance comes to my house. Like I don't choose which company is called, but so it's just another one of those things that I never would've thought, you know, I'm not gonna call 9 1 1 and say, oh, but don't send that ambulance. They're not in network with my insurance. It's absurd.

Mia Silverman 27:00

It's, we we're so behind when it comes to healthcare. We have amazing doctors in this country. We have amazing research happening, but need to put healthcare as a priority and so people can access it just 'cause they can also then access therapy and other, like mental health treatment as well. So there's so much that goes into it. But yeah, getting those medical bills in the mail, I was not very thrilled. Not thrilled at all, but they, they were paid for now. So it's all good, definitely not ideal.

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 27:26

Yeah. And thank you for emphasizing. I think a really important point. We have great healthcare providers. We have great doctors and allergists, we have great nurses, emergency personnel, all but the system. It's a systemic thing that we are talking about, not the individuals. Obviously we don't wanna criticize these people working so hard to keep us safe.

Mia Silverman 27:43

I'm so grateful for my doctors and nurses that, you know, keep us safe, but it's the system that's exactly what it is. And

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 27:49

Yeah.

Mia Silverman 27:49

day it'll change and it'll become better for everyone.

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 27:52

You're so widely connected in the allergy world in terms of people who are fighting for change or organizations or movements that really are meaningful to you for bringing up?

Mia Silverman 28:00

I really love the work that FACT does, which is stands for Food Allergy, anaphylaxis Connection Team. They offer so many amazing resources that are free and accessible to everyone. And they were, one of the supporters for the ADDE Act, which is trying to be passed in. California, which is to require restaurants in California to have the allergen labels in their menus, which is essential and so important. And I also really value, I think the one that the organization that's actually like lobbying and heavily involved is Asthma and Allergy Foundation of America. Also amazing and really support and love the work that they do. And I think also just the fellow allergy advocates, even if they have small accounts, they're making a difference. Like I think no matter how many followers you have, whether you have like. A hundred to like a million. Like we're all in this together trying to make a difference and make the world a safer place. People with allergies. So I think, any allergy advocate that, has the courage to share their story online, I really like applaud them and think that they're a great asset and amazing, like, and make a big impact in the allergy space.

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 29:01

I'll make sure I link everything too so that people can find it in the notes if they're not familiar. It's always good to give that extra, like, thank you to those people working so hard for us.

Mia Silverman 29:09

And even doctors like Dr. Rubin, who's a friend of mine, he is excellent. There's two different Dr. Guptas, one that's Dr. Richi Richi Gupta, who's great. The other one, She's also a friend of mine and she is excellent. Dr. Payel Gupta. Yeah.

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 29:22

Okay.

Mia Silverman 29:23

also really amazing and advocates for, not only allergies, but also just like safety in the world for people with allergies and all the chaos that's happening in the world. I really admire her advocacy for what's happening around the world with children. Um. So I think there's also amazing healthcare providers that, you know, dedicate their lives to, to like not only helping people with like allergies, but also they also post online and share information about what's happening with the FDA, what's happening with the current administration, what's happening with food labeling, all these really important things, new, new, new allergy treatments that are coming out. It's really awesome. They're providing all this information for us for free. 'cause it makes it more accessible. So they're also part of that change that I love seeing happen.

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 30:03

I agree. We can't choose whether we have food allergies, but there's a lot of choices. That you're making that you're are such a great role model about. It's also can be overwhelming for people to sift through and navigate when there was nothing. And now there's so many options.

Mia Silverman 30:16

so many, which I think is great that there's so many options, but there's a lot. And so it's hard to figure out what is the best choice for sure. Doing your research is important. And even again, these doctors will post online about these different kinds of medications and what they do. And I try to post about it too when I can, I remember doing a slideshow, all different kinds of types of epinephrine. Devices. I'll showcase all different kinds and their pros and cons. But I think there's so much information out there, which is kind of great. 'cause then you can do, it's easier now that we have the internet so we can see what's like the best fit for you.

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 30:46

Yeah. You mentioned your recent trip, um, and people love to see that you travel and they love to see you eating out and knowing that this is doable. What do you wanna share with us about that?

Mia Silverman 30:55

Yes. I mean, I will say like I living proof that you can travel with allergies. Like if I can do it, so can you. It also takes a lot of, you know, preparation for that. But that is something that if you really wanna focus on, you can do it. And there's so many resources out there, like the Equal Eats, allergy cards, this is like not sponsored. I don't work for them or anything. Like I just the cards. The owner, Kyle Dine's such a great guy. I love the work he does

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 31:21

He was my first episode. I give him a shout.

Mia Silverman 31:24

Yes. We love Kyle Dine. He's iconic. He's a legend. Um, and um, yeah, so I have all these different allergy chef cards and different languages wherever I travel to. So this time I went to Prague in Amsterdam. So I got one in Czech and one in Dutch. And when I tell you it, my made my life easy. It made my life so, so easy. Like restaurant that I would go to and there was like a language barrier, I would just say. here's this card. And they're like, oh, okay. Understand. Got it. And they know they, they totally get it. And some places they do speak English like Amsterdam. They speak. Fluent English, which is great. So it was really easy to communicate, but I still had the allergy card just in case there's a language barrier of some kind. And they understood immediately what I needed because the card says, you know, you use clean gloves, you use clean equipment. Like all the things I really carry on and concerned about for my allergies. That was like one of my key things to use was the allergy chef card. I also really like using for translating conversations with the chef, if you need to talk to them is ChatGPT. Their translator is way better than Google translate, in my opinion. And obviously ChatGPT can be controversial, but I use it for reasons that are, make my life easier like this because it's, it's about safety and keeping myself safe and it's really helpful. So there was like a misunderstanding. I would just. You know, write what I wanted to say and say, translate this into check and then show it and they understand and they can talk back to me. And I also think when I travel, I always go to countries that have good healthcare and, and I'm in the city where there are hospitals accessible to me. So in case, worst case scenario, I could just go to the nearest hospital. So when I had that reaction with my, with my brother, we had that reaction. The hospital was like, less than a 10 minute drive, which wasn't terrible, which is a little bit far, but it was, it was the closest one they had available and they, they took him in immediately. So. Always making sure you're going somewhere that has good healthcare, always bringing extra safe snacks. I mean, I pack a carry on with like of, if you know the brand Larissa's Kitchen, they have great beef sticks that are top nine allergen free. I pack like a whole thing of them in their I pack, you know, like tons of like, like dried fruits. Protein of some kind, sort of fiber, apple sauce. Abe's muffins are good to pack with you. I love bringing those like breakfast, 'cause breakfast is a hard meal for me 'cause I can't really eat with breakfast because I can't really have eggs. I can't have like waffles or pancakes. So the muffins are a good alternative to eat for breakfast and have some fruit and that's super easy. So always packing safe snacks and, you know. And also researching restaurants ahead of time. So what I would do is I would always like go on Google, look up safe restaurants, go to the Spokin app. They have a lot of great reviews for like international restaurants, so I'll kind of see what they have on there and also asking chat GBT too, and just see like what they have to say on there as well. And then calling ahead or emailing them and asking them like, Hey, I have these allergies. Can you accommodate me? Yes or no? Then we email back and forth and they say yes or no, and almost all restaurants said yes. So it was super easy. So when I went there, they remembered who I was, was like, I was the one that emailed you. They're like, okay, cool. So it just having to plan a lot, which is not ideal. But then when you, once you do it, it's worth it because then you have everything kind of in un control in order, and it makes it really easy. So I just have like a bunch of, I just we're dumped a bunch of stuff,

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 34:31

I'm gonna have to do like a shout out to Mia's favorites list because we wanna support the brands who are helping us. Right? And

Mia Silverman 34:36

yes.

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 34:37

you've run through them all and figured out trial and error. What, what's good and what works for you.

Mia Silverman (@allergieswithmia) 34:42

I don't gatekeeper. I wanna make sure everyone knows like what the best brands are because again, my job is to show how to make life easier with allergies too and what the best brands are that like, and I, I mean, I get like, I love Abe's Muffins. I love Larissa's Kitchen. They're great products to travel with. Make Good is also a great brand to bring like safe snacks with you as well. So there are so many amazing products out there you can bring with you. Um, and. Yeah, I think you know, and always carry for me, I also brought like a ton of epinephrine on me. I probably bought like three or four like packs of it 'cause you never know. So I always

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 35:17

Right.

Mia Silverman 35:17

to bring extra medicine and then pre-board the plane. Wear a mask on your flight, wipe down your seat, talk to the flight staff so they can make sure that they can do an allergy announcement. That whole thing. There's a lot that goes into it, but once you do it, it's worth it. Then you feel so much more safer in control, and that's what you want to feel when you're traveling with allergies.

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 35:34

Does it get easier the more you do it? I mean, I'm sure the first time you boarded a plane and tried to do all those things, it probably was a tougher than it is now.

Mia Silverman 35:41

Yeah, I mean, it gets so much easier. It kind, it comes like a routine, like brushing your teeth. You just do it and you don't really think much of it, and it's just part of your routine. It's kind of like the new normal. So for me, like it's kind of fun for me to get to kind of do some research, find different restaurants, see what I like, talk to them. I kind of enjoy the process. It can get a little bit kinda repetitive. It gets kind of like exhausting at times, but. I kind of enjoy the process 'cause then I feel like rewarded after like, wow, I worked so hard to find these restaurants and now I can actually eat, eat at them and enjoy and feel safe and they know how to accommodate me the way I need to be accommodated. So it just gets easier with time and you have to just kind of be patient with yourself through that process.

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 36:19

Yeah.

Mia Silverman 36:20

but there are also people that their job is to find like safe restaurants abroad as well. Like to help give you travel plans. And my friend, her name's Allie Bahn, her Instagram is, um, miss_allergic_reactor. She's a great food allergy travel expert. She's awesome. I love her. She's so nice. So I also recommend like talking to people that, that know, like that they do this for, for a living. So there's so many resources out there again that are accessible. So.

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 36:48

Yeah. Well, thank you for sharing them all with us. You mentioned one of the things that I wanted to follow up on and you, you said about finding a restaurant And then sometimes you'll even go back because they remember you. One of the things I love that you posted was I, it was, I think about your boyfriend just saying like, he doesn't mind going back and obviously supporting you. And I was hoping, if you're comfortable, do you mind talking a little bit about dating? 'cause that's such a sticky area for many young people

Mia Silverman 37:11

I mean, I had my fair share of men who would say, I can't take you 'cause you're allergies. Like it's a burden. I'm like, it's a burden for you. It's a burden for me. Like what do you mean it's a burden for you? Everyone that has

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 37:20

for you.

Mia Silverman 37:23

But I think that there are really good people out there, and my boyfriend is. So amazing. He's so accommodating and he just wants me to feel safe. And you know, we, and we ate at the same restaurant like three days in our row and he did not seem to mind. He is like, he's like, oh, you can go there again. Yeah, I love the restaurant. I'll just order something different. Try something new this time. Dating can be hard. It's the same, same thing with like finding friends. You know, if a guy or a girl or someone, whatever you like, is not respecting your allergies, goodbye. Not even worth your time, because how are they? If they can't respect that, how are they gonna respect you? In general, it's a big part of who you are, and it's part of like keeping yourself safe if they can't respect that part of you. You don't want that person in your life,

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 38:02

Right.

Mia Silverman 38:02

wouldn't want that in your life. You wouldn't probably, I like no one would. So I think just using as a filter to figure out who and who is and who isn't worthy of your time. And you gotta just kiss a lot of frogs, just like finding friends. And there will be good people out there that you will find who are super understanding, who may not even understand it, but they want to understand it. And that in itself is amazing. Like my boyfriend has a cousin that has allergies, but he wasn't, is noted to the extent of how severe they can be. And you know. been able to educate him. He is been able to learn from me and watch my videos and follow what I do. And he's, and he learns, he's willing to like, ask questions. And even if they're kind of silly questions, there's no wrong question to ask. There's no such thing as a stupid question. Um, so I think there's also being open to like having to. vulnerable and having to share that part of your life with someone, you know. 'cause having allergies can, people can feel insecure about it. I've felt insecure about it my whole life until like, you know, posting online kinda helped me build my self confidence. So being able to be open and be like, okay, talking about that with someone. And they, if they, if they're a good person, which, and they are, they'll understand, they'll want you to feel safe and do whatever they can to make you feel safe,

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 39:10

Yeah, it's a good reminder and you pe you and people like you who are doing it and making it more visible makes it easier for everyone because people are just getting more used to hearing it and people communicating it and asking for their needs to be met. So that's helping all of us, so thank you for that.

Mia Silverman 39:24

Exactly. Thank you. I mean, my, my goal is also try to normalize it in some way and so people understand that allergies are like. pretty common now, and that I think people need to know that, that, that they know that they exist and that they are real, that they are severe, and to just acknowledge that people like me exist and to be accepting and open to that. And it seems like for the most part, it. You know, people are, 'cause my videos get so much reach my job again is to normalize allergies and so people can see that. You know, it's a thing, and it's not like a myths, not like you're not picky. It's a real thing. And this is how we navigate our lives so they can just be aware of it. And if they meet someone that's allergies, they say, oh yeah, I know how to, I know all about allergies. I know how to, I know I kind of understand them a little bit more. So that's kind of like my goal too. So

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 40:09

Yeah. Good. Well, I'm glad the bullies haven't scared you out of it. It sounds like you have no plans to stop doing that. And do you wanna tell us about your other future plans? You're starting grad school, you wanna study psychology plans.

Mia Silverman 40:21

So I am going to get my master's at Columbia for clinical Psychology, and I'm also doing like a research study with my professor. I've been doing for the past, like. Over a year now with NYU Langone Children's Hospital doing like an OIT mental health, uh, quality improvement kind of study. So we're gonna be continuing that throughout my grad school and hoping, doing, doing like, like a master's thesis on that and hoping to get it published. That would be the goal. Um. My dream is to become a food allergy psychologist and help people with allergies and other chronic health conditions like diabetes or even like celiac, other dietary restrictions, because allergies takes a toll on your mental health like it does one way or another. So I think that, you know, seeing like a therapist really helps. It makes your life a lot easier and or at least. Makes having allergies a bit more manageable. Um, so that's my goal. Um, and I wanna continue being an allergy advocate, posting online, sharing my experience in grad school too, because it's also kind of fun to showcase that part of my life. So just continuing that journey of mine is kind of like my plan for the future, for the next few years at least.

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 41:25

That's great. I, I get so excited. I've met so many, young people recently who are going into the mental health field, and it's so exciting we need so many more of you, especially those of you who have lived it. You know, I'm a parent.

Mia Silverman 41:35

Right.

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 41:36

I bring a different, I did have food allergies when I was young, but I didn't manage what he does and what you do and, and the severity of that., We need that perspective. People feel so understood when they're talking to someone. As we said before, who has actually lived what they're going through.

Mia Silverman 41:49

exactly, I think there's a high demand in the mental health space for, especially after COVID, just in general, but I think with people with allergies. a very high demand for that. So my goal is to be able to be one of those people that can help others with allergies and help them feel more confident and set those boundaries, love themselves and embrace their allergies. 'cause it's worth embracing. Like I'm grateful I have allergies even though I don't like having it. Sometimes it can be annoying, it can be a pain in the butt. I'm also grateful for, 'cause it's made me and molding me to who I am today and I'm really grateful for that. So

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 42:19

Thank you for saying that. It's, it's a good reminder.

Mia Silverman 42:22

yes,

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 42:23

What do you want people to know that we haven't gotten to?

Mia Silverman 42:26

know, I think just knowing that It makes you a strong person if you have allergies and. Just know that like if there's someone that's newly, like that's diagnosed like recently that has allergy, like newly diagnosed, just know that it does get better and it does get easier with time and just know that like. You're not alone. People with allergies, there's a whole community out there, people with allergies that want to, you know, connect. And I think just knowing that like it's, you're not alone. And there's tons of studies being done, tons of research to make our lives better. So to not lose hope either there's people who dedicate their whole lives to this to make our lives better, who are trying to create new, you know, epinephrine types of devices, new kinds of treatments to get rid of allergies and to just, you know, try to think about those. Really exciting things that are happening in our future and to advocate for yourself if you feel comfortable doing that and you're not alone and it's gonna be okay.

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 43:20

Yes. Can't hear it enough, right?

Mia Silverman 43:22

Yes, exactly. Exactly.

Amanda Whitehouse, Phd 43:24

Good. Well, this is gonna be helpful for so many people listening. Thank you so much, Mia.

Mia Silverman 43:28

you for having me. This was so awesome. Thank you,

43:31

As we wrap up, here are three action steps inspired by today's chat with Mia. Number one, revisit your yes list. Take a moment to think about what you wanna say yes to, even with your allergies in the picture, whether it's a new food, a new experience, certain educational decision or career choice, a new way of advocating yourself growth in your relationships. What feels possible when you stop feeding the fear and face those challenges. Number two, talk about the hard stuff. Bullying, anxiety, medical trauma facing, scary medical decisions like food challenges or treatment options. None of it disappears when we ignore it. So if our conversation today got you thinking about some of the things that are challenging for you, bring it to a trusted friend, a support group. Find a resource online that feels like you can connect with people. Get yourself a therapist if you might benefit from it. You're not alone. And number three, expand your toolkit. You can follow Mia on TikTok and on Instagram at Allergies with Mia. Her website is allergies with mia.com and you can also find her on YouTube. Mia shared a bunch of her favorite resources and advocates, and so I'll list those for you in the show notes. But to recap, she mentioned FAACT Food allergy and Anaphylaxis Connection Team AAFA, the Asthma and Allergy Foundation of America. FARE or food allergy research and education's teens with food allergies and Teen Advisory Group, Dr. Zachary Rubin, Dr. Ruchi Gupta, Dr. Payel Gupta, equal Eats. Larissa's Kitchen, Abe's muffins made good. The spoken app, Allie Bahn and Miss Allergic Reactor. So if you're not following any of those already, you can find them easily on social and in my notes if you need the links. Thank you so much to Mia for joining us and sharing all of your insight and your lived experiences. Your voice has been really powerful in normalizing and validating the allergy community and making people feel less alone. If this episode helped you to feel more empowered or less alone, I'd love you if you would leave me a review or share it with somebody who needs it. the content of this podcast is for informational and educational purposes only, and is not a substitute for professional medical or mental health advice, diagnosis, or treatment. If you have any questions about your own medical experience or mental health needs, please consult a professional. I'm Dr. Amanda Whitehouse. Thanks for joining me. And until we chat again, remember don't feed the fear.